I heard the cheers and sounds of victory as I let another week go by and also again that I won’t write unless I’m allowed to. That’s when I heard another sound, the sound of rally. They whisper grab two of your personal journals and write as they reassessed they would watch. Ofcourse my negativity knows its not to help me but to laugh at me. Either way. The constant editing and still not have the edits take is also frustrating.

I’ve repeated yet another conversation…okay several but mostly small ones and then the long and exaughsting one. I am still very much anti people being friends. I am still running into people who want to prove a point to me. Police on speed dail. Everyone with their own agenda fulfilling there own needs. Forcing me to talk it out when that is not what I need. Trying to convince me I don’t know what I need.

Not looking forward to the summer. Not that we really had a winter. I am thinking of as much as I can to be prepared for the heat. I am putting back as much money as I can and have most of my large necessity expenses for the year behind me. The rest will have to wait till I have the money saved. I want to get in a place asap but ofcourse some one decided to vandalize my car and the battery I kept worrying about had a bad read. Seems like anytime I have money something happens to set me back. That’s real life but the law breaking and forceful and abuse being done by manipulative people who want to make some one break, bow down or to show control and power over some is not okay. Ofcourse the agruement is but that is the reality of your life and that is why you must except it. I was even told to my face the other day that they don’t want to let me up they want to keep me down. It is what it is and like I said all I really can do is call the police again and each time it happens.

When I did my budget and looked at money to save and what I am expected to pay and quite frankly willing to pay for parking,  is was over 7000 dollars. That is only shy 3000 from the 10000 to put back from about 9 to 12 months rent. I looked at that for awhile before I excepted the amout and rationalized it all to the voices in my head, then moved on to the next thing to budget.

Reading a couple of books. A poetry book ofcoures and another book I had started reading on my phone but decided to go ahead and buy a tangible copy. I prefer tangible books to digital or electronic ones.

The goal of getting to the gym is not happening. People who like to assume I am too comfortable and liking living out of my car have decided to use opportunities to invade my space while I sleep. Also people who say they know me. If that was so then you would know I am a home body and love being at a home base. I NEED a home base. Then ofcoures people who think only of me ‘being’ another person completely disrespect I have a life of my own and prefer it that way and not a huge fan of being called someone else.

Personal space. It is important.

Kimberly 6:52 4/15/23

Edited